


I Want To Lose

by wishfulFeline



Category: Pocket Monsters: Sword & Shield | Pokemon Sword & Shield Versions
Genre: Angst, Angst and Tragedy, Comfort/Angst, M/M, hashtag relatable, tfw when u have to crush the dreams of the person you love most
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-18
Updated: 2020-01-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:25:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22306390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wishfulFeline/pseuds/wishfulFeline
Summary: Victor doesn't want to be champion. How could he possibly want to be champion when the person who cares about more than anything wants that too?
Relationships: Hop/Masaru | Victor
Comments: 3
Kudos: 91





	I Want To Lose

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by tealleadership's trainshipping comic on tumblr and wrenaissance's fic Dethroning Drabbles chapter 2 <3

The only way Hop could think to describe Victor’s expression was that he looked like he had just left a funeral. Today was supposed to be wonderful! Why did he look so devastatingly sad?

But in Victor’s heart, how could he  _ not  _ be devastatingly sad? He was so close to the Champion Cup. He and Hop had completed their gym challenge together to the end, and he should’ve felt proud, and elated, and excited, but...Victor didn’t want this. He didn’t want to win this. He didn’t want to win against Hop again.

He’d witnessed Hop go through such an emotional rollercoaster on their journey, becoming overcome with self-doubt, having his bountiful confidence torn away from him, working harder than he ever had before and still failing over and over again. But Hop hadn’t stopped trying. He kept working, even if Victor could tell the reason he’d turn his back to him was if he couldn’t entirely hold back his tears. Hop had made it to the Champion Cup, and Victor knew that without a doubt he was someone who deserved to be there.

And Victor knew that he could beat Hop in that battle. 

Victor...it wasn’t that he didn’t like himself. It wasn’t that he thought he would be a bad champion. It was just...this wasn’t what he wanted. Hop’s passion and enthusiasm and determination is what kept him inspired to start and continue on his adventure through the Galar region. But he knew Hop’s dream was to be the Champion. He knew that this meant absolutely  _ everything  _ to Hop. How could he possibly want to win knowing that to be true? 

“Oi, mate, you alright then?” Hop asked Victor. He came off as nonchalant, but he was truly worried. He hunched over a bit to look at Victor’s face as he hung his head.

“Hop, I don’t want to do this anymore,” Victor answered, voice cracking. 

Hop was taken aback and quickly replied, “What do you mean by that!?”

He felt lucky they were alone as he buried his face into his hands. “I don’t want to be Champion. I don’t want to win.”   
Hop grasped his wrists but didn’t force them apart. “Hey, hey, where is this coming from? Are you nervous? That’ll pass! You and I still gotta battle in front of that huge crowd! Victor, it’s gonna be amazing!” he insisted. 

Victor shook his head quickly. “That isn’t it! I don’t want to do that!” 

Hop gripped his wrists tighter. “Did someone tell you something mean? Did someone threaten you? Vic, please, what’s wrong?” he asked, voice getting quieter the more unsure he became. 

“Because this is  _ your  _ dream! I want you to win, I want  _ you  _ to be the one to win and beat Leon and be the Champion!” Victor wailed, yanking his arms away, clenched fists shaking at his sides.

Hop gaped, completely confused. “Vic, you’ve gotta be kidding me…”

“No!” he shouted. He looked up at Hop, teardrops escaping his eyes. “I’m in love with you!”

“Wh—Hold on, hold on, Victor,” Hop tried to interrupt, dumbfounded and flattered at the same time.

“I love you a-and I want you to win! I don’t want to be champion! I don’t care what happens to me, I can aim to be a gym trainer or something, I care about you! Please! I don’t want to battle you!” he cried. 

“Then I’ll win!” Hop shouted, grabbing Victor’s shoulders. “I’m gonna win, Victor! Trust me!”

Victor was stunned to silence as Hop intended.

“So you better try your damn hardest! You better win again and again and get everyone super hyped up until you and I can finally face off the way I’ve wanted so much since the very start!”

Hop stamped one of his feet, filled with more energy than his body could contain. “ _ That _ was my dream! I would’ve never kept going if it weren’t for you staying by my side! So, you have to battle me, and you have to battle me with everything you’ve got! Because I want to win with everything that I’ve got, too! So—! So—!” he gasped out of breath. “Stay my rival until this very last battle. And stay my rival after that too. Stay with me for the rest of my life, dammit.”

Victor hugged Hop desperately, each of them shaking and crying against the other. “Okay...I will! I promise I will! And—A-And I’ll cheer for you till my throat hurts when you battle Leon!”

“Mhm! Yeah! It’s a promise!” Hop swore. He kissed Victor’s tear streaked cheek. He hoped that was enough of a response to Victor’s confession until he worked himself up to say it out loud. 

Even so, regardless of what they said or did, up until the very last second of their battle, they were both petrified. 


End file.
